wacky wednesday - a drink for the "adventurous"

Almost a year (August 28, 2013) ago I read an article in The Globe and Mail (a newspaper in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada) and at first thought it was humorous... then gross... then ghastly... then unbelievable...and back to humorous... then gross...  you get the picture.

The article states that the bar in The Downtown Hotel in Dawson City (Yukon Territory) is famous (or infamous?) for its Sourtoe Cocktail - any kind of liquor (40% alcohol or higher) served with a preserved human toe bobbing up and down in the glass. Customers with enough chutzpah to try a Sourtoe Cocktail are supposed to touch their lips to the toe but not put it in their mouth or try to swallow it. And there is a "club" - yes, the Sourtoe Cocktail Club - for those that try the drink. For real. I can't make this stuff up. Google it if you don't believe me.

Now the part that made this whole thing "newsworthy" is that a card-carrying member of the Sourtoe Cocktail Club (identified only as an American) came in one evening, ordered the cocktail, drank it and swallowed the toe before paying for his drink and leaving. The bar's "Toe Captain," Terry Lee, was concerned because they only had one toe left now. The article quoted him as saying "Now that we only have one toe, we have to use it continuously and that's going to contribute to the deterioration of the toe." (Seriously? They have a "Toe Captain?" And THAT was his concern? But that's a blog post for another day...)

The rest of the story is almost as humorous... gross... ghastly... unbelievable... well, you know. After the story broke on CNN and hit the internet, the bar decided to advertise for new toes to replace the one they lost and maybe get a few extra. Their ad read:

Got Frostbite? The Downtown Hotel in Dawson City, Yukon is currently seeking toes

 for its world-famous Sourtoe Cocktail.

Donor will be forever immortalized in the Sourtoe Hall of Fame.

Contact adam@yukonhotels.com for details.

The bar received several offers from people who had suffered  amputations from accidents or were undergoing surgical procedures involving removing a toe or toes. Donors brought or mailed their toes to the bar where the toes were sterilized in alcohol and then stored in margarita salt until they could float on a fresh shot of whiskey.

And I thought having a prickly pear margarita was being adventurous. 

wacky wednesday - a duck tale

One of my favorite things to do when I am out is people-watch. Sometimes I make up stories full of mystery, intrigue and plot twists about the people I see. It is an entertaining way to pass the time when I'm waiting. The other day I stopped at the lake in our neighborhood while I was out walking. This is the story...

A DUCK TALE

No one thought anything exciting ever happened in the quiet neighborhood of Suburbia. It looked pretty much like a thousand other neighborhoods with well-kept homes, beautifully manicured lawns, and garden beds full of colorful flowers. Most people knew their neighbors, or at least thought they did.

Mrs. Quack was a quiet, unassuming young duck who lived near the lake. She had a few good friends and most everyone liked her.

Mrs. Quack's five ducklings were darling - but not like the other ducklings. Though they looked soft and fluffy, they were NDITs - Ninja ducks in training - and were tough. They worked very hard and were proud of their black masks.

As NDITs, the Quack siblings learned to swim in formation and obey their commander, Mrs. Quack - or Mama Quack as they called her. 

Ninjas learn to be very quiet, to swim without splashing and, most importantly, to be watchful and ready for anything at all times. Commander Quack was proud of her young recruits. Soon they would be ready for their first mission.

Finally, the day of their first mission arrived! An operative had left a coded message vital to national security at a spot marked by an "X." They were excited, but focused, as they swam along a cement embankment looking for the spot.

Suddenly, the infamous foreign spies, Boris and Natasha, showed up! They were hoping to intercept the coded message which would endanger the lives of hundreds of Ninja Ducks around the globe.

Boris and Natasha quickly spotted Commander Quack and her NDIT's. Boris gave pursuit as the Ninja team made their way along the embankment. 

And then, in the flash of an eye, who should appear but Blanca Shnozz?! Her neighbors thought she was an old coot because she often had red eyes and could be rather cranky but Blanca was, in reality, a superhero with an amazing superpower! She was able to throw an invisible force field from her beady red eye. The government often used her to help protect young recruits.

Commander Quack and her NDITs found the spot where they believed the coded message was hidden. The first dark "X" must be it!

Commander Quack carefully tucked the coded message in her wing feathers. She and the NDITs prepared to leave the site but one of them, Ninja Nate, stayed behind to make sure Boris and Natasha were not following them. 

Once Ninja Nate was positive they were not being followed, he swam swiftly but quietly and rejoined his team.

Commander Quack and her NDITs rendezvoused  with Ninja Nate at the mouth of the lake. The coast was clear. Boris and Natasha were no where in sight! According to Blanca, they took off shortly after she arrived. Apparently, they did not want to swim into the powerful force field and be vaporized. The coded message was safe!

Commander Quack led her team back to headquarters. The NDITs had passed their mission testing and became full-fledged Ninjas. Suburbia became an even safer place to live and play.

wacky wednesday - disneyland trivia

I like to talk to people. It doesn't matter whether they are old or young, a friend or a stranger. I learned some interesting trivia on a recent trip to Disneyland just because I engaged in that lost art form - conversation.

#1 - The horses that pull the street car on Main Street work three hours a day, three days a week. It's a cushy job for them since most come from other "careers." The horse pulling our street car came from an Amish farm where he worked 10 hours a day!

#2 - It's common knowledge that Disney employs "cast members" to assist "guests." Besides perks of merchandise and food discounts, cast members also get unlimited admission into all Disney parks worldwide EXCEPT for Tokyo Disneyland where a 1-day admission is 6400 yen ($62 USD).

#3 - There are five cast members selling Mickey Mouse balloons for $14 each throughout Disneyland. They sell a combined total of 2000 balloons "on a good day." You do the math.

#4 - The most popular Mickey ears hat is the traditional black one. It's good to know that tradition is alive and well, at least at Disneyland.

#5 - The most popular ride among cast members, according to the poll I conducted, is Big Thunder Mountain Railroad (32%) followed by Haunted Mansion (20%), Space Mountain (16%), Indiana Jones (12%), Pirates of the Caribbean (8%), Star Tours (8%) and The Tiki Room (4%). Surprisingly, NO ONE chose my personal favorite -Storybook Land.

wacky wednesday - paper clothing

I recently saw a comic in the paper that not only made me laugh but also took me on a trip down Memory Lane.

     F MINUS

In 1966 the Scott Paper Company, as a marketing stunt, offered consumers, for the low price of $1.25 and a coupon, a paper dress made out of "Dura-Weve," a cellulose material patented almost a decade before. That marketing ploy paid off as it kicked off a craze the likes of which the fashion industry had not seen before. Paper dresses were mass produced and by 1967 they sold in major department stores around the country for about $8. Consumers could also purchase paper underwear (perhaps the precursor of disposable diapers?), men's vests (why???), girl's pinafores (but no boy's clothing?), wedding gowns (a deal at $15), raincoats (hard to believe they would be waterproof) and even bikinis (only good for two or three wearings!).

There was "talk" about paper garments taking over the entire clothing market. Paper clothing was just one of many new disposable products available in the 1960's when disposable cutlery, plates, razors, pens and lighters became readily available. My parents had disposable pens and lighters and we occasionally used paper plates and cutlery. But when I begged my parents for a paper dress, they emphatically put their foot (feet?) down with a resounding "No child of mine will wear disposable clothing!" For them, it was a cost thing. My mom could make me a dress for a lot less than $8 and it would last for years eventually being handed down to my sister, cousins and sometimes neighbors. Even a store-bought dress was less than $10.

The "talk," however, was wrong and the novelty soon wore off. By 1968 - just one year later - paper garb had disappeared from the clothing market. Why? They didn't fit well, they were uncomfortable, the colors could rub off, and they sometimes were flammable (watch out for those new disposable lighters!). They ended up as waste in a landfill in a society becoming more aware of the environment. And the hippies arrived on the scene with their flowing, romantic vintage-style clothing. The wind had changed...

wacky wednesday - tee hee hee

We just got back from a week in North Carolina visiting the grandkids and their parents. One of the things I love about being there is listening to kid conversation, and in particular, kid jokes. Even though I've heard most of them many times, each child tells them with different expression and emphasis which makes me laugh again and again.

I asked each of the older kids to tell me their favorite joke. As expected, "knock knock" jokes were at the top of their lists.

Christopher (age 10)

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Aaron.

Aaron who?

Aaron out my stinky gym shoes!

Nick (age 9)

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Dishes. 

Dishes who?

Dishes your friend, let me in!

Ben (age 7 (almost))

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Blue.

Blue who?

Blue Berry!

Lexie (age 6)

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange you glad I didn't say banana?!

Ellie (age 4 months)

She doesn't know any jokes but she makes me laugh with her expressions and "talking!" It seems as though she is trying to tell a joke as she babbles and then waits for a second before delivering the punchline and breaks into a huge smile. 

It has been said that laughter is the best medicine. I think it might be. The effects of laughter and exercise are similar - heart rate increases, oxygenation of tissue increases, stress hormones are reduced. People who laugh often tend to be healthier and happier. So go find something to laugh about … giggle… guffaw… snort… and let loose a belly laugh!

wacky wednesday - people, it's a bucket!

People have been having babies since… well, since Adam and Eve. And, in the beginning, what one needed for a baby was pretty basic. But now new parents (and grandparents!) are bombarded with the latest and greatest baby paraphernalia. Some things are absolute must-haves - a carseat and a place for baby to sleep, for example. Others, like a jumper seat, are in the nice-to have-but-not-essential category. And then there are the money-wasters - wipe warmers would be one example, in my opinion.

I was walking through a local baby store and saw these.

What you can't read underneath "washPOD" is "The most natural way to bathe baby!" What is "natural" about sticking your baby in a bucket to bathe them?

Apparently they are all the rage in Europe. Proponents of them claim it simulates being in the womb for the baby. Really? I'm pretty sure uteruses are not made of hard plastic and there are no bright lights in there. They are recommended for ages newborn through six-months. It is not easy to hang on to a wet newborn IN A PLASTIC BUCKET FULL OF SOAPY WATER!

Now imagine my surprise when I discovered you can order adult-sized inflatable bath pods! I love a long soak in a hot tub probably more than most folks - but not scrunched up in a bucket! And I just don't believe that a baby likes it either. Call me old-fashioned but I think a plain ol' bathtub is just fine - for baby and for me.

wacky wednesday - it's the pits!

Clay Thompson writes a column, Valley 101, for The Arizona Republic, our local newspaper. He answers readers' questions about pretty much anything in a semi-sarcastic (okay, really sarcastic)  manner and frequently says things like, "You people have too much time on your hands!" when he gets random queries about insignificant things - which is most of the time.

As I was cutting up fruit this week, I wondered why some of the fruit had several small seeds (like the apples) while others had just one larger pit (like the peaches). I pondered this conundrum while I finished cutting up fruit knowing it is the kind of question that drives Clay crazy.

A little internet research provided an answer. ALL fruits have seeds. Some fruit - apples, grapes and pears, for example - have several/many small seeds and other fruit - peaches, plums and apricots, for instance - have a single seed encased in the pit which protects the seed until conditions are right for it to start to grow. Different plants require different growing conditions - soil pH, sun vs. shade, etc.

Fruit seeds are spread when animals eat the fruit. If the fruit has many small seeds, the animal typically eats the entire fruit and the seeds are eliminated in the animal's poo (called scat for those who are really interested in that kind of thing) which provides fertilizer for the fledgling seedlings. Many seeds are needed since the survival rate is low for unprotected seedlings in the wild. 

On the other hand, if the fruit has a pit, the animal eats the fleshy part of the fruit and leaves the pit. As the pit is exposed to the elements and breaks down, the seed inside begins to grow while being protected by the decomposing pit which becomes fertilizer for the seedling. 

Maybe Clay is right. Maybe I do have too much time on my hands.