wacky wednesday - how the times change

In the course of living life, everyone experiences stress. The car breaks down, the babysitter gets sick, the boss is unreasonable, kids are ... well, kids.

In days of yore (that would be the 1960's), advertisers convinced us a warm, relaxing bath would get rid of all our stress. Remember "Calgon, take me away?" (You can view the commercial here.) For less than two bucks you could purchase enough Calgon bubble bath for a dozen or so de-stressing soaks. I remember people thinking that was a splurge - you don't need bubbles to take a bath.

Fast forward a "few" decades to the present time. During a recent flight, as I was perusing the Skymall Magazine, I read about a device designed as an "escape to a world of serenity and slumber" ... the serenity pod.

The description continues with "(its) elliptical exterior blocks 90% of outside noise while the interior amplifies the sound inside. The wireless sound system gently rocks you to sleep with vibration while the LEDs change colors wirelessly from an app on your smartphone or tablet."

And for only $10,000 it can be yours. Yes, that was TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. And while you are at it, order a smaller one for your dog or cat for a mere $1000. Seriously, just how stressed do you think your pet is? 

I don't know about you but if I spent $10,000 on my bed or $1000 on Fido's bed, I would be anything but serene. 

wacky wednesday - you might be in arizona if...

I am almost a native Arizonan (my family moved here when I was five days old). I have briefly lived other places, never longer than a year, and always return "home" to Arizona. Over the course of many years, I have noticed certain... um, peculiarities... about the great state of Arizona.

You might be in Arizona if ...

1.  Mileage markers on the freeway are in kilometers, not miles. Interstate 19 (I-19), a freeway of just over 63 miles that runs from Mexico to Tucson, is the country's ONLY highway that lists distances in kilometers instead of miles. The Carter Administration orchestrated it to make the interstate more accessible to tourists coming from Mexico and also to introduce the metric system to Americans. As we all know, the metric system never caught on here but businesses don't want the signage changed. However, speed limit signs have always been in mph, not kph.

2.  You find spent cartridge cases ("desert shells") on a roadside picnic table. Arizonans love their guns. I think it goes back to our "Wild West" roots. It is not uncommon to see folks walking around town with a gun holstered on their side. There are at least two gun ranges within ten miles of our house. Finding a deserted area in the desert for some target practice is a fun way to spend a Saturday morning. 

3.  You see rivers with no water. It is not uncommon to drive over bridges with nothing but a dry riverbed beneath them (often with vegetation growing in the bottom!) and a sign identifying the "river." The photo below is the Gila River!

4.  You see saguaro cactus. Arizona is the only place in the United States where saguaro cactus grow. And they grow abundantly! These majestic cacti often look like they are beckoning to us, telling us to "c'mon over!"

5. You see a handicapped parking place with a ramp to the picnic table at a roadside (not a "rest area") picnic area. Arizonans are friendly and welcoming to visitors and "new transplants." Many of our winter visitors are disabled or have difficulty walking, especially on uneven terrain, and roadside stops like this one make it easier for them.

Arizona is well-known for a lot of things - the Grand Canyon, our mild winter weather, our blisteringly hot summers, a sheriff who makes inmates wear pink underwear and copper, to name a few. I have to admit I love both the little and the big things that make Arizona different. There is no other place I would rather live. I hope you feel that way about the place you live - it is a wonderful feeling!

wacky wednesday - truth or fiction?

State legislatures have a lot on their plates right now. Education issues. Health care. State budgets. School vaccination requirements. Prison reform. Illegal immigration. So I was deeply puzzled about Oklahoma's state legislature spending valuable time deciding whether or not they should repeal a law they passed in 2007 declaring the watermelon their state vegetable.

That's right. Oklahoma legislators passed a bill, and the governor signed it, designating the watermelon their state VEGETABLE and now some lawmakers think they should repeal that law because, well, a watermelon is a fruit. I couldn't help but wonder if they just now realized that. Or was there more to the story?

Rush Springs, OK is home to the state's annual watermelon festival and the self-proclaimed watermelon capital of the world. The people of Rush Springs felt the watermelon should be honored with official status. One of their legislators agreed but the strawberry had already been named Oklahoma's official state fruit in 2005. He found a "scientist" who was willing to say that, while technically a fruit, the watermelon is also a vegetable since it is an edible plant. Using that logic, wheat and rice are also vegetables. This flawed logic allowed the legislator to introduce a bill, which passed and became law, naming the watermelon the official state vegetable of Oklahoma.

I agree with the legislator trying to repeal the law. Questionable or out-dated laws make a mockery of our legislative process. They could make the watermelon the official state melon thereby eliminating the "confusion" and making everyone happy.

Unfortunately, the hours and days spent debating frivolous topics in state legislatures is not rare. For example, in 2014, New York legislators passed a bill naming yogurt the state's official snack after hours and hours of debate addressing such important questions as "Should the official status be limited to low-sugar, low-fat yogurt?" and "Since many people can't consume dairy products should they designate a lactose and non-lactose state snack?" And in 2011,  Arizona's legislature passed a bill designating the Colt Single Action Army Revolver, a gun popular in the 1800's as the Wild West was being settled, the  official state gun after spending days debating the pros (it preserves a piece of Arizona's history) and cons (it was a gun that killed many Native Americans in the Wild West) of such an action. And the list goes on and on.

Some legal commentators have suggested that frivolous topics for legislative debate are necessary - that they add a little humor to the workplace and help "destress" the body of legislators before they go on to more hot button topics.

I say if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.

In the meantime, roll up your sleeves and tackle the important issues. If there is time left in the session after ALL the essential concerns are taken care of, then go ahead and debate which silverware pattern should be the official state one (Kentucky chose Old Kentucky Blue Grass - The Georgetown Pattern in 1996) or whether "silly haircuts" should be allowed on children (several states have laws prohibiting "silly haircuts").

wacky wednesday - midnight marauders

One Saturday night about midnight, just as I getting up from my chair to go to bed, my sweet hubby announced that a new geocache 1.2 miles from our house had just been posted. We immediately sprang into action.

For a geocacher, one of the most fun things is being able to write "FTF" (First To Find) on the log. Many caches are posted on the website late at night or in the early morning and it amazes me that people are out hunting at 3:00am. And now we were about to join the ranks of the midnight marauders.

We quickly gathered the bare necessities for geocaching (a smartphone, a pen and some gloves) and drove to the area where the cache was. Urban geocaches are sometimes tricky because you need to be aware of muggles (non-geocachers who might take or vandalize the caches). I often take my camera just to provide some "cover" for us walking around and getting into awkward positions as we look for the cache. But at 12:30am I was pretty sure there wouldn't be too many muggles around the industrial park area we were searching.

Boy, oh boy,  was I wrong!

When we arrived, two police cars were parked in a Circle K parking lot at the major intersection about a quarter of a mile away. Soon a third one joined them, all with their lights flashing. We wondered if they could see our flashlight beams dancing around and discussed which of our friends we would call to bail us out of jail.

We watched the same pick-up truck leave one of the businesses carrying some firewood in its bed and return empty four or five times. I wonder if they were as curious about what we were doing as we were about what they were doing. Who gets firewood delivered in the middle of the night?

A little after 1:00am a sedan came careening into the parking lot where we were and made a fast turn in the opposite direction going around the building. Hmm... that was kind of curious. We never saw them leave.

Around 1:30am a couple of cars drove down the street into the industrial park areas and a little while later returned to exit onto the main road.

Throughout all this activity we tried to be as inconspicuous as possible and still search for a "micro"  cache in the dark. After we had searched the same area at least a dozen times, I finally found it's hiding spot.

Oh what fun to be midnight marauders AND put FTF on the log!!

it bloomed!!

About a month ago I purchased a hyacinth bulb "planted" in a vase of water (see indoor gardening). For about a week and a half it did absolutely nothing at all. I changed the water every three or four days and still it did nothing.

Then the green sprout on top began to grow a little. Soon I began to see little cracks in the bulb and thought I had broken it when I was lifting it out of the vase to change the water. And I continued to wait and watch.

Finally, about two weeks ago the green sprout started to open up and I could see green, tightly closed buds. I eagerly checked it every morning to see if, finally, there was a flower. But each morning it looked pretty much the same as it had the day before. Still I continued to change the water and talk to her.

And then, four or five days later, the green, tightly closed buds began to open revealing the softest baby pink petals. Over the next few days more and more opened up.

I HAD A BLOOMING HYACINTH IN A VASE IN MY KITCHEN!!

She has a delightful fragrance that makes my kitchen smell like a garden! And the shadow of the leaves and bulb/vase looks like a bunny! ;-)

She has continued to open up a little more each day. What a delight it is to walk into the kitchen each morning and not only see, but smell, a beautiful flower!

I just have one question. What do I do with the bulb after the flower is gone? Oh Google....

wacky wednesday - electronic thin mints?

It's that time of year again. You can almost smell it in the air. That's right, I'm talking about Girl Scout cookies. Whether your favorite is Thin Mints (the best-selling cookie nationally) or Samoas or even Trefoils, just about everyone buys at least one box from the cute little Brownies or the enthusiastic older Girl Scouts trying to raise money for a trip.

I sold Girl Scout cookies when I was a child. My children were Girl Scouts and they sold cookies. Valuable lessons and skills were learned through the process of selling cookies. Things like "Stand up straight and look them in the eye if you are trying to sell them something." And "Talk clearly and know your product." Or "Some people will say no. They aren't rejecting you, they just don't want any cookies. Say 'Thank you for your time' and move on." We learned how to make and count back change. We learned that you sold more cookies if you wore your uniform and smiled than when you wore your grubby clothes and looked at the ground.

I have personally bought Girl Scout cookies for over 35 years. I don't buy them because they are the best cookie ever made or because they are a great value (they are NOT!). I buy them to give girls a chance to practice talking to an adult they don't know, to feel successful when she's "convinced" me to buy another box of cookies, and to learn the things I learned selling cookies.

But things are changing in the Girl Scout cookie world starting this year. They are going digital. That's right... on-line ordering is available in some areas now with more being added each successive year. Individual Girl Scouts can invite customers via an email to visit their "virtual cookie store," order cookies and pay with a credit card. You can choose to have your cookies delivered by a Girl Scout or shipped directly to you.

The spin is that this digital option better prepares girls to live and work in the digital age and is a safer alternative to door-to-door selling.

I am not so sure.

People still need people skills in "the digital age" and you get those by interacting with people, not by sending them an email. And who is "doing the work" in this arrangement? The girl who sends a mass email to everyone in her parents' e-address book and waits for the orders to roll in while she's off playing with her friends? Or the customer who clicks on the link, fills out the form, trustingly enters their credit card information and then picks up their order from their mailbox?

And is it really safer than door-to-door selling? I would not want my elementary school-aged child's personal information on a website. It doesn't matter what security precautions the Girl Scout organization has taken with their on-line program, it can, and will, be hacked. When a parent accompanies a girl doing door-to-door selling, the safety risk is practically non-existent and the girl is engaged in an activity with her mom or dad.

A neighbor girl we had not yet met rang our doorbell a few weeks ago and was selling Girl Scout cookies. She was accompanied by her mom and brother (who ran back to their house to get more cookies!) but she did the selling, told us how much we owed and counted out our change. We chatted for a few minutes and then she was on her way to the next house. About a week later, I found this on our doormat when I returned home:

Shea is learning and demonstrating valuable life skills (the art of writing a thank you letter, letting people know you appreciate what they have done) as well as business skills like good customer service. And you better believe I will buy the bulk of my cookie purchases from her next year!

I will continue to buy Girl Scout cookies when a Girl Scout shows up on my doorstep or if I see girls selling at a cookie booth (there is an app - Girl Scout Cookies Finder - to help you locate cookie booths near you!). Maybe I'm old-fashioned but I like personal interaction and will not participate in digital cookie sales.

wacky wednesday - for the person who has everything

My sweet hubby and I went to the same high school and had many of the same friends. Our group was kind of an eclectic mix of people - band nerds, science club nerds, Boy/Girl Scouts or not, those who had part-time jobs and those who didn't, those who got straight A's without much effort and those who had to really work at getting good grades. But the thing that tied us all together was our love of fun and a good practical joke was golden!

We remained friends through college although we got together less frequently as jobs and school dictated our lives more and more. Several of the guys liked to go mineral hunting and on one of their mineral expeditions they found a "sculpture" in the desert. They gave it to the next guy in the group to have a birthday and it was passed around from birthday to birthday as a gag gift throughout college.

After graduating from college, as often happens, we drifted a little farther apart. Work and families now took most of our time and some years all we did was exchange Christmas cards. The silly "sculpture" still made the rounds although it would sometimes stay with a recipient for a year or so rather than a few months before moving on.

Then, as we approached our 40's, we made more of an effort to stay in touch. We'd get together for one big birthday bash for everyone or make sure we all went to a high school reunion. Email, and eventually FaceBook, made this easier to plan and implement. But the passing of the "statue" had more or less ended. The guy who had it moved out of state. And besides, weren't we getting a little old for such a silly thing?

This year all the guys turn 60 and I was anticipating a get-together sometime this year. What I didn't expect was this sitting on our doorstep when we got back from church Sunday morning:

If nothing else, it was a magnificently original wrapping job using two different boxes, red and gold sparkly spray paint and yards and yards of duct tape. It had a card and a sign taped to the side.

My hubby's 60th birthday is this week so it was clearly for him but who is S.P.O.B.?? We scratched our heads. And wrinkled our brow. But nothing was coming to us. So we moved on to the card.

Once he saw who the card was from (thank you, Helen & Dave!), he knew exactly what it was. And then began laughing so hard tears leaked out of his eyes.

It was Bacilla (aka the "statue"), a glob of melted, white plastic containers of some kind that stands  about 30-inches high. The propellor was added later - it's not too hard to believe that several of the guys are engineers of one kind or another!

So where was Bacilla for the past two decades? The guy who had it last moved it out of state when he moved. And then moved it back to Arizona when he returned years later. He passed it on and that guy kept it about five years before passing it on to the next guy, Bill, who then moved to California. Bill brought it back to Arizona last weekend and passed it on to my hubby.

And what does S.P.O.B. stand for? The Society For The Preservation Of Bacilla. Bill made up the name when he made the sign so it's no wonder we couldn't figure it out!

Two things about this story make me laugh. First, not one but TWO people moved this discarded blob of melted plastic out of state and then brought it back again. Clearly, it has great sentimental value as well as being whimsical yard art. And second, four decades later these guys still love a great practical joke among good friends.

A friend loves at all times.   Proverbs 17:17